We imagine Elon Musk’s future antics on Twitter

Paid accounts, certification without identity verification, double badges, publishing long messages, adding functions at the request of his fans… Elon Musk is turning everything upside down on Twitter. To end the week with a smile, Numerama’s editorial staff had fun coming up with some fun changes.

You’d think Elon Musk would be rational once he got on Twitter, but that’s not the case. In the release, the billionaire is talked about every day by multiplying the announcements, even if it means coming back after a few hours. One of the first changes announced is the launch of a new paid formula that includes certification, without identity verification, which earned him a lot of criticism. Then Elon Musk submitted many ideas, such as posting long messages, launching a YouTube competitor, bringing back Vine or uploading videos. We also mentioned a paywall system, which would allow you to pay to see tweets (for example, for pornographic content). All this in just 10 days.

At Numerama, we regularly have fun discussing future changes that Elon Musk might make. In this funny article, here are the best of our worst ideas.

(Warning, in the era of fake as if it were real, we prefer to insist that everything written here is fake).

By Elon Musk’s own admission, Twitter will be doing a lot of “dumb things” in the coming months.

The crazy ideas that Elon Musk can come up with

Selling a lot of badges, to look cool

Twitter isn’t making a lot of money and Elon Musk wants to change that. With his $8 per month subscription, the billionaire has already started monetizing the service. He wants to ask everyone who criticizes him for $8 and jokes that he will ban people who misuse their certified account, while keeping their money.

What can he do to earn more money? The introduction of a second gray badge, for official accounts, gave us ideas. What if Elon Musk allowed brands to sell badges for their fans, taking a commission? Then we can pay for a lot of Twitter badges, and fill the billionaire’s coffers. Our colleague Raphael Grably, from BFMTV, was excited to imagine what it might look like.

Fart sounds in tweets

One of Elon Musk’s favorite jokes is fart noises. Tesla vehicles have an option to “honk” every time the horn is pressed. It’s hard not to imagine the billionaire adding the ability to tweet noises, like a prout.

A $999 monthly subscription to “Twitter God” so you can ban people

After Twitter Blue at 8 dollars, we can imagine Elon Musk launching more expensive formulas. In addition to an ad-free version, which might actually be a good idea, why not launch a super-powered version to give superpowers to the rich (Elon Musk says he wants to give power back to the people, but the his first decision was to offer exclusive functions to those with money).

Banning people you don’t like for money is an idea the billionaire might like. After all, Elon Musk now has all the power.

A bird in space, for a publicity stunt

After the Tesla Roadster into space, sent by a SpaceX rocket, will Elon Musk offer a publicity stunt on Twitter by sending the social network into space? It can send a giant tweet into orbit… or send a little blue bird. Knowing him, we can imagine that he already has this idea in mind.

Starman and his space vehicle, in 2018. // Source: Wikimedia/CC/SpaceX

Claim the Truth and Speak Out, in the name of freedom of expression

A few weeks ago, Elon Musk took delight in publishing a slightly photoshopped photo of the three musketeers (before it was deleted). He showed it with Donald Trump and Kanye West, two other defenders of freedom of expression according to him. Coincidentally, the former American president created TRUTH Social, a competitor to Twitter, and Kanye West wants to buy Parler, the Twitter of the American conservative right.

If Elon Musk wants to make Twitter the reference platform, approaching his two rivals seems logical. Will there be an alliance between Elon, Kanye and Donald?

Montage published by Elon Musk when Kanye West bought Parler.  // Source: Deleted tweet
Montage published by Elon Musk when Kanye West bought Parler. // Source: Deleted tweet

Is Twitter encrypted like Canal+?

Last crazy idea, inspired by a real rumor: a blurry Twitter after a few minutes. According to The Verge, Elon Musk is considering making Twitter free for just a few hours a month, to charge people who use it frequently.

Twitter's encrypted homepage may look like this, but does Elon Musk know about Canal+?  // Source: Numeroma
Twitter’s encrypted homepage may look like this, but does Elon Musk know about Canal+? // Source: Numeroma

Why not go further by taking inspiration from Canal+? Can Twitter be free for 5 minutes, then scramble everything afterwards? The Twitter+ formula will make it possible to unlock the social network.

Will any of these ideas ever see the light of day? We doubt it. But since taking office, Elon Musk has proven to be very unpredictable.

For more

Elon Musk / Twitter // Source: Numerama

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *